After taking a little hiatus from updating about my mom, I'm back with a short update. I needed time away from thinking about everything that is going on with my mom while she's in rehab.
Long short: The Hanley Center told my mom they had filed the Marchman Act, which is something that "can be defined as a course of action that can be done either voluntarily or involuntarily to provide substance abuse emergency services and temporary detention for individuals in need of substance abuse evaluation and treatment".
So, she's been forced to stay in rehab until July 14th. BUT when July 14th comes around, my mom is going to find out that everyone wants her to stay in inpatient rehab longer than that. She is going to be really mad.
Anyway, I am going to Florida for family weekend (which you can read about here or check out the previous post). I'm nervous about telling my mom that we are going to go through with the Marchman Act if she decides to leave July 14th, but I'm excited to see my mom SOBER and spend time with her...and also to learn about how an alcoholic family functions. I hope it is healing in some way.
Has anyone ever gone to a family weekend like this? I'd love to hear your experiences.
It is a good thing that your mom got stipulated to the rehab. Maybe she will now understand the seriousness of her addiction when she learns that Doctors have decided that she is a threat to herself. Anyway at least you can tell her that other people besides family are looking out for her best interest.
ReplyDeleteI think that you will benefit tremendously from the family program by learning more about addiction. I have been to numerous rehabs and I know firsthand how insidious alcoholism can be. Until I took responsibility for my Bipolar Disorder I could not stay sober. While you are there I suggest that you ask about dual diagnosis because for some people the two issues overlap. At one rehab they called it "double trouble."
If you have any specific questions feel free to ask, I don't mind sharing. Most of my life has been spent studying addiction, because I did not know why I could not overcome it. The paradox is that "self knowledge alone is not the answer" (from the Big Book of AA). I believe it to be true because I have the obsession to drink, so how can I be objective since I am the one obsessed? Therefore I need to put trust in a power greater then myself to succeed. I digress.
they really downplay her bipolar disorder here. they believe it is all alcoholism and that her "depression" will lift once she stays away from the drink and has a purpose in life (bc she is an empty nester). And I don't doubt those things are true, but I worry that they fail to see that the bipolar drives the addiction in a lot of ways.
ReplyDeleteOne question I've been thinking about is...do you think she will come around to "willingness" or is her being in rehab a waste of time?
My opinion is that your mom is at the best place that she can be for her to become willing to stop drinking. I believe the professionals at the rehab are the best hope for your mom. Only God knows if the rehab pros will succeed and if your Mom will become a willing participant in the program. If she doesn't it would not be a waste of time for two reasons. One, the seed will be planted. And two, you can go to your grave knowing that you did everything possible for your Mom.
ReplyDeletePlease be sure to tell them that Bipolar depression doesn't lift no matter the situation. It is a chronic condition that comes from a chemical imbalance in the brain. Also antidepressant medications are known to trigger manic modes in bipolar people. When a person goes manic they often lose their judgement and do things like drinking even though they know they are alcoholic.
I can pretty much tell you everything you might want to know. My adult sister was at the 50plus program at Hanley. I've spent a bit of time as a loved one helping others. Check out my radio show (link below) on my archives page about Hanley and its boomer program. I have just moved out to California from Florida where I was for over 30 years (just a half hour away from Hanley actually). If you have any questions at all just feel free to contact me at any time.
ReplyDeletehttp://webtalkradio.net/2011/03/21/addicted-to-addicts-survival-101-%E2%80%93-baby-boomers-in-treatment/
My niece attended the family program there and it was very helpful for her with my "egging her on " to follow through.
Hi hun
ReplyDeleteIf you'd like to chat more about tackling Bipolar Disorder nutritionally please email me direct and I can recommend some books and I'm happy to discuss this with you. Of course I haven't ever taken medication so I am unsure as to how coming off meds can affect a person but I have read widely about the matter.
You can email me at: thebipolarkid@yahoo.com or find me on Facebook:http://www.facebook.com/ataleoftwomes
I look forward to chatting with you.
TBK
I just started reading your blog and I REALLY like it. My sisters and I write a blog as well. You can visit it at www.ManicMama.org . Your story sounds similar to our except we are lucky because my Mama stopped drinking and has been sober for a year now. My mom went to rehab two years ago because she was completely out of control and extremely manic. Rehab was good because it kept her out of trouble but it didn't do much good in treating her illness. The doctors took her off ALL her meds and told her that when she stops drinking bad things will stop happening. Of course that was a lie because even when she wasn't drinking she still had the symptoms of her mania causing trouble. She eventually got kicked out. The doctors reasons were that she wasn't following rules. She was talking to the males in the program even though she wasn;t supposed to (she was hyper sexual - a symptom of mania, she was stealing things - a symptom of mania and she wouldn't sit still during group sessions - another symptom of mania). I was furious...Rehab is a great way to deal with the drinking but I would HIGHLY recommend a dual diagnosis facility! Good Luck!
ReplyDelete